Tasked with raising a generation of boy who will have to navigate a complex world of diversity and rapid change, here’s how to teach them to be great humans.

As parents, carers, grandparents, guardians, teachers, mentors and role models, we are tasked with raising the next generation of men, a generation that will have to navigate a world of complexity, diversity and rapid change.

At the same time, we must also support existing adult men to guide and shape the next generation. But to do so, we must first confront the fact that traditional models of masculinity and manhood, which have long defined what it means to be a man, no longer serve us today.

We need to break free from rigid, outdated notions of masculinity that teach boys and men to suppress their emotions, hide their vulnerabilities and conform to socially constructed ideals of power and strength.

We need to raise great men, not by simply telling them how to behave or what to believe, but by teaching them how to think for themselves, how to feel and how to be authentically themselves.

This is not about simply shifting the burden of gendered expectations from one side to the other—this is about creating space for boys and men to be whole humans, giving them permission to explore masculinity without judgement and to embrace the full spectrum of their emotional and human experiences.

Over the years, I’ve worked closely with boys, facilitating programs and observing their struggles, triumphs and moments of self-discovery. The challenges boys face today are both vast and nuanced, but the traits they need to thrive remain constant. The actions I’ve listed below aren’t just about teaching boys how to be great men; they’re about teaching them how to be great humans.

1. Build resilience

Life is full of challenges, setbacks and failures. Building resilience in boys means teaching them how to handle adversity, bounce back from failure and keep moving forward. But resilience isn’t just about “toughing it out”; it’s about learning to sit with discomfort, asking for help and finding solutions in the face of difficulty.

In this modern era, we grow up with the Australian idea of “She’ll be right, mate”, which means everything will be OK. But in fact, this teaches us to suppress, not talk and bottle it all up. Resilience isn’t about strength and bouncing straight back with no battle scars—it’s about the repair after the rupture. It takes time for wounds to heal, as it does for us to bounce back from setbacks.

Here are some strategies that can help build resilience in boys:

Encourage problem-solving

Don’t rush in to solve the problems of boys and men. Instead, ask them, “How do you think we can solve this?” or “What could you try next?” This helps them feel like they can ask for help but still maintain a level of control. We need younger men, in particular, to develop problem-solving skills and to understand that mistakes are an opportunity to learn and grow.

Celebrate effort over outcome

Often, we focus on success (wins, results). But celebrating effort and progress shows that resilience is about persistence, not perfection. If we fail at something it should not be final. Dealing with, sitting in, being uncomfortable with failure, or even rejection, is important. Conversations should be shaped by questions like, “What can we try next time?”

Model resilience

When things get tough, whether it’s a family situation, work stress or a personal setback, talk about how you’re dealing with it and the strategies you’re using to stay strong. Open up, even when it’s uncomfortable or feels awkward. This gives us all a blueprint for coping with adversity in our own lives.

2. Encourage self-awareness

Being self-aware means understanding who you are, what you value and how your actions impact others. It’s about developing a sense of identity that is rooted in self-respect and authenticity rather than external expectations. For many men, this journey of self-awareness is clouded by societal pressures and peer influence.

We need more role models providing younger men and boys with opportunities to reflect on their values, passions and aspirations. For example:

Encourage reflection

Ask, “Was there a moment when you felt upset? How did you handle it?” These questions help everyone think about their actions, their emotions and their responses.

Model reflection

Take time to reflect on your own actions, particularly when things don’t go as planned. Say things like, “I could have handled that situation better. Next time I’ll try to stay calm and think before I react.” This shows that self-awareness includes learning from mistakes and taking responsibility.

3. Empower with responsibility

Boys and men need real responsibilities. It can start with taking care of a pet as a youngster, managing a school project or maintenance around the house. Then, as we transition into younger men, we can help with family decisions. It’s about offering boys a chance to make decisions, to follow through on their commitments, to feel the weight of responsibility. This fosters self-confidence and provides a sense of purpose.

Then, as we venture into manhood, our foundations are built on purpose and responsibility, which helps us live a life of service.

4. Create safe spaces for emotional expression, while teaching consent and boundaries

Encouraging men and boys to speak openly about their feelings is not about going soft or “woke”. It also doesn’t need to be artificially manufactured. It needs to become a natural part of our everyday life. Create environments where emotional literacy is the norm, not the exception, around dinner tables, in the lounge room, in the car, at our sports clubs and in group activities.

We need to get back to the essentials of our human existence. Instead of filling up our time with doomscrolling or countless extracurriculars, promote activities like journalling, group talks and one-on-one discussions. Encourage going back to nature—walks, hikes, swims, surfing, anything. Outdoors is where we’re meant to be!

Use these spaces to have meaningful but non-threatening conversations about life in general, mental health, family, and important topics like consent and sexual health. In these conversations, give real-world examples of what respecting boundaries and healthy communication in relationships look like.

Teach respect for boundaries

From a young age, make sure boys understand that everyone has boundaries and that it’s important to respect those boundaries. This includes teaching them that if someone says “No”, the answer is “No”. Teach them the importance of asking for consent, whether in games, conversations or even with physical touch.

Model healthy relationships

Show them what respectful communication and healthy boundaries look like in your own relationships. Whether it’s a conversation with a partner, your children or extended family, model how to set boundaries and negotiate with kindness and mutual respect.

Foster conversations about gender equality

Encourage exploring ideas around gender equality, respect and shared responsibility. Discuss how much of the house duties and caregiving women do compared with men, and why this is not fair nor sustainable. Talk about wages, pay, traditional gender roles, and get everyone in the home or class to explore these topics. Guide the conversation, but allow boys to feel safe to say the wrong thing, and the conversation to get messy and politically incorrect.

Article supplied with thanks to Mum’s At The Table

About the Author: Adriana is Mums At The Table’s part-time digital content creator and writes from Kingscliff, Queensland.

Feature image: canva.com

Chores aren’t just about cleaning the house.

According to child psychologist, Susan Woodworth, it’s important that our children contribute to the household, and part of this is taking part in jobs around the house.

“You want them to grow into responsible people who have an internal sense of being driven, responsibility. It keeps them engaged in your family even when there’s no one there to reward them.”

Pocket Money

When asked about incentivising it with pocket money, Susan said, “When we link pocket money to chores, we can actually undermine the thing that we’re trying to build in our children.”

“Imagine giving your child an allowance to scrub the toilet. They’d probably do it, but only as long as the money keeps coming. Once you stop giving them pocket money or the allowance, the toilet scrubbing is going to stop too.”

Susan reinforced the need for them to contribute to the family, home and society.

“You want them to be engaged, contributing members of their community.”

It Has to be Done

The reason we teach our children to do chores is not so they will learn about reward, but because they are learning that things need to get done and that collectively, we’re the ones to do it.

“It has to be done, and you actually like to use a clean toilet. It’s intrinsically motivating.”

Susan explains that there are two types of motivations.

“There’s extrinsic motivation, which comes from outside the person, such as rewards, sticker charts and pocket money. Intrinsic [motivation] is the inner drive to do something because it feels meaningful or worthwhile.”

If chores are only linked to pocket money, that drive will only last as long as the pocket money that is coming in.

“But if it’s intrinsic, they’ll want to do it because it actually feels good, it feels worthwhile, they want to help. And they like things clean.”

Belonging

Susan acknowledged that it is difficult to get teenagers to care about chores and to see the value in cleaning. But it’s actually about belonging.

“ When kids feel like valued members of the family, they want to contribute. It’s wired into us. Like as humans, we want to belong. So instead of framing chores as like this job we have to do, we can frame them as, this is how our family takes care of each other. This is how our family takes care of our home.”

Change the Language

“The language can change a bit. It’s their way of saying, ‘I love my family and I want to be part of the team helping it run’.”

Some families don’t even use the word chores or jobs. They simply add it to ‘things that help our family’ and they do the task together.

“Those small word changes can change how a child relates to the things you’re doing.”

Allowances

Susan said there is an allowance to giving your children an allowance based on chores.

“When there is bigger stuff, because it’s good for your children to have an allowance and pocket money as well. It’s good for them to learn to manage money and earn money. So for those above and beyond chores, like washing your car or weeding and mowing the lawn.”

She stressed it is more of an opportunity for them to understand how to earn money. Then they can weigh up effort and reward which is a skill they should be taught.

“Is it worth $5 to mow the entire lawn? Oh, actually, maybe it is,” she said.

“It’s about getting the system that works for your family, not the perfect system. It’s about staying connected to why you’re building those skills for the child that you’re going to guide into adulthood. You need to let your kids know that they belong to your family and your family runs on love and contribution and yes, even a clean bathroom every now and again.”

Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.

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Masculinity has had a pretty bad rap from the media recently, but good men add incredible value to their families, friends, colleagues, community and broader society.

There are certainly distorted expressions of masculinity that deserve criticism. Aggression, emotional withdrawal and irresponsibility can greatly wound families. Yet the blessings of a man being a man, especially good fathers, are often the unsung virtues that strengthen and bring deep peace to a family and a home.

The mark of a good man and dad is selflessness. And selfless masculinity itself is not toxic. Weak character is toxic. Mature masculinity places his strength in the service of others.

Psychological research recognises that masculinity can contribute to relationships and wellbeing in either positive or negative ways, depending on how it is understood and expressed. The American Psychological Association specifically encourages positive father involvement and healthy family relationships.

1. A Good Father Shows Up Consistently

Children do not need flawless fathers. They need dads who keep turning up.

A father’s influence is built through ordinary moments: family meals, school drop-offs, helping with homework and listening when a child wants to talk. Research consistently shows that involved fathers contribute positively to children’s emotional, social and educational development.

As Harvard researcher Joshua Jeong observed, “Paternal stimulation positively relates to children’s Early Childhood Development Index scores.”

The challenge for many dads is simple – be there, and be fully present. Put down the phone, make eye contact and create regular family rhythms. Small moments repeated over years often become a father’s greatest contribution.

2. A Good Father Provides Protection and Security

Protection involves much more than keeping a family physically safe. A good father helps create a home where people feel emotionally, relationally and spiritually secure.

When difficulties arise, his family knows he will not disappear. He may not have every answer, but he remains invested while the family works through challenges together. Healthy strength is not intimidation or control. It is strength governed by love. Selfless.

Research into fatherhood and child development has found that a father’s emotional wellbeing and engagement can significantly influence a child’s development and family environment. Children thrive when they know there is someone dependable standing beside them through life’s uncertainties.

3. A Good Father Inspires Courage and Confidence

Fathers often help children take their first steps into the wider world. They encourage them to try again, take healthy risks and discover that failure is not the end of the story.

This is not about pushing children beyond their limits. It is about communicating, “I believe you can do this.”

A major review of father involvement and childhood cognition found that most studies reported a positive and statistically significant relationship between involved fathers and children’s cognitive development.

Whether teaching a child to ride a bike, apply for a first job or navigate disappointment, fathers can build confidence by offering encouragement rather than rescuing them from every struggle.

4. A Good Father Sets Loving Boundaries

Children need affection, but they also need direction.

A good father understands that genuine love includes guidance, correction and accountability. Boundaries teach children that choices have consequences and that freedom carries responsibility.

Christian fatherhood ministries frequently warn against two extremes: authoritarian control and passive withdrawal. Healthy fathers avoid both. They combine consistency with compassion, helping children understand not only what is right, but why it matters.

Strong fathers guide rather than dominate.

5. A Good Father Teaches Practical Wisdom

Some of life’s most important lessons are learned alongside a father.

Children absorb wisdom while helping with chores, repairing something broken, managing money, camping, fishing or simply watching how Dad responds when plans go wrong. They are learning far more than practical skills. They are learning character.

Researchers have found that fathers who engage in play and learning activities contribute positively to children’s developmental outcomes. Often, the lesson is not the task itself but the attitude demonstrated while completing it.

A wise father invites children into everyday life, explaining not only what he does, but why he does it.

6. A Good Father Leads with Integrity

A father’s credibility does not come from appearing perfect. It comes from being dependable.

Integrity means keeping promises, telling the truth, accepting responsibility and admitting mistakes. One of the most powerful lessons a father can teach is the ability to say, “I was wrong. Please forgive me.”

As leadership writer Mark Cole notes, “Children learn more from observation than instruction.” What fathers model often leaves a far deeper impression than what they say.

A man who lives with honesty and responsibility leaves an example that can influence generations.

7. A Good Father Encourages with Strength and Compassion

The best expressions of masculinity bring strength and tenderness together.

A father can be courageous while remaining compassionate. He can solve problems while also listening carefully. Sometimes children need advice, but often they simply need dad to sit beside them and understand.

Psychologists have warned that teaching boys to suppress emotion can create long-term relational and emotional difficulties. Healthy masculinity, by contrast, allows men to express love, grief, compassion and affection with confidence.

The voice of a loving father often becomes one of the voices children carry with them throughout life.

What Makes a Good Father Today?

Fatherhood is about influence as much as biology. Stepfathers, grandfathers, foster fathers, mentors, coaches and pastors can all provide a fatherly presence.

The qualities that matter most remain remarkably consistent – presence, protection, courage, boundaries, wisdom, integrity and compassion.

Healthy masculinity is not defined by dominance, noise or self-promotion. It is seen in men who make others feel safe, help others become brave and remain faithful when life becomes difficult. A father’s greatest legacy is often not what he achieves, but the character he models and the encouragement he leaves behind.

As Scripture reminds us, “As a father has compassion on his children, so the Lord has compassion on those who fear him” (Psalm 103:13).

Article supplied with thanks to Vision Christian Media – a non-profit, follower-funded Christian media ministry taking God’s Word to every corner of Australia and beyond through broadcast, online and print media.

Tosh Sturgess is a pastor, evangelist and radio host with Vision Christian Media, where he hosts the Sunday Morning Together program. He is also the Director of Digital and Published Media.

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Small changes to make family life feel easier.

Are you one of the many mums who feel like your life is constantly stuck in fast forward? No matter how hard you try, you can’t find the pause button?

It is normal to want to try to fill every day with enriching activities, balanced meals, educational toys, organised homes, successful careers and endless memories worth posting on social media. You end each day feeling exhausted, but still wondering if you’re doing enough.

There’s nothing wrong with having high standards as a parent. Every mum wants to care for and raise her children in the best way possible. However, is rushing around all day, every day, really the best way to do that, even if you do get all those amazing meals cooked and enriching activities ticked off?

If you’ve ever wished you could enjoy your children more rather than simply managing them, or if you’re resonating with the need to slow down, maybe the trending “slow motherhood” hack is worth exploring.

Slow motherhood is not about giving up ambition or pretending that modern life isn’t busy. Instead, it’s an invitation to approach family life a little differently, in a way that values connection over constant productivity.

What is slow motherhood?

At its heart, slow motherhood is inspired by the principles of slow living and slow parenting. Popularised by author Carl Honoré, the slow movement encourages us to stop rushing through life and start paying close attention to what truly matters.

Applied to parenting, that means creating space to enjoy the present moment, even when your calendar is full. It’s not about being perfect, but being present. It’s about choosing connection over perfection, replacing constant rushing with a little more intention and recognising that the little things often become the biggest memories.

Whether you’re raising babies, toddlers, school-aged kids or teenagers, this approach reminds us that our children don’t need endless entertainment; they need us.

What slow motherhood isn’t

If you’re a type A person, the word slow might trigger some uncomfortable associations in your mind. You might even be imagining sitting in the sun reading a book or baking sourdough, while your kids sew their own clothes and water the garden with a slow-pouring watering can.

Slow motherhood isn’t quitting your career. It isn’t baking bread every weekend or homeschooling your children (although there is nothing wrong with that). Neither is it living on a farm, growing vegetables or saying no to technology. It isn’t about having a spotless home or creating Pinterest-worthy birthdays. And it definitely isn’t about judging other mothers.

Many mums embracing slow parenting are ambitious, career-focused and juggling demanding jobs alongside raising kids. The goal isn’t to slow every part of life down. It’s to slow yourself down enough to notice the moments that matter and to be more involved in our children’s lives.

The benefits of slow parenting

Modern motherhood looks very different from that of previous generations. Many mothers are balancing work meetings, school pick-ups, household responsibilities, emotional labour and endless notifications from social media, often all before lunchtime.

For new parents, juggling feeding schedules, sleep deprivation and learning how to care for a tiny human can feel like there’s no room to breathe, let alone slow down.

As your children grow, the pressure often changes rather than disappears. There are sports, homework, birthday parties, extracurricular commitments and carefully scheduled activities competing for every spare minute. Before long, your entire to-do list revolves around everyone else’s needs.

The beauty of slow parenting isn’t found in huge dramatic changes. It’s found in the small choices you make every day. Research consistently shows that secure relationships are built through responsive interactions, not expensive experiences. That means:

• Reading one extra bedtime story
• Listening without checking your phone
• Making eye contact
• Sharing breakfast together
• Undivided attention, even if it’s only for 10 minutes

Those small moments build trust, create belonging and often become the stories your children remember years later.

When we embrace slow parenting, we often discover more joy, less guilt and a calmer rhythm that benefits the whole family.

Can busy, career-driven mums practise slow motherhood?

Absolutely. This is perhaps the biggest misconception. You don’t need endless free time to embrace slow motherhood. You simply need to become more intentional with the time you already have.

If you’re ambitious, running a business, building your career or working full-time, remember that your children don’t measure love by the number of hours you’re together. They remember how those hours felt.

When a child knows they can come to a parent, receive full attention and genuine interest, and that their parent is truly available when they need them, they feel safe, loved, heard, seen and wanted. This is where slow living becomes surprisingly practical.

Instead of trying to balance every single thing, maybe ask yourself, What deserves my energy today?

Sometimes the answer is work. Other times it’s rest. Or perhaps it’s sitting on the floor building Lego. All three have value.

Practical ways to practise slow motherhood

The good news is that embracing slow motherhood doesn’t require a complete lifestyle overhaul. Here are some practical ways to begin.

1. Start the day more gently

Instead of immediately reaching for your phone, take a deep breath. Enjoy your tea while it’s warm. Cuddle your kids for an extra minute.

Beginning the day calmly often creates a positive ripple effect for everyone.

2. Protect quality time

You don’t need entire weekends. Fifteen uninterrupted minutes after school or before bed can become meaningful quality time.

Put your phone away. Listen. Laugh. Play.

The consistency matters more than the duration.

3. Simplify your to-do list

Not everything deserves space on today’s to-do list. Choose the essentials. Leave room for flexibility. Sometimes the dishes can wait while your children tell you about their day.

4. Create simple daily routines

Predictable daily routines help everyone feel calmer. Simple breakfasts together. Evening walks. Everyone shares their day over dinner. Reading before bed.

These simple things create emotional security for kids.

5. Spend less time comparing

It’s impossible to enjoy your own life while constantly measuring it against highlight reels on social media. Remember, you’re seeing curated moments, not real life. Comparison steals joy. Connection restores it.

6. Slow down without falling behind

Taking a deep breath before responding to your child isn’t wasting time. Pausing before saying yes to another commitment isn’t laziness. Choosing fewer activities may actually allow your family to enjoy the ones you keep.

A slower pace often creates happier homes.

Giving yourself permission to change

Many people imagine slow living means escaping to the countryside. In reality, it’s about intention, not geography. You can practise slow living in a busy city apartment just as easily as in a rural town.

At its core, it’s finding and relishing all the good things hidden inside ordinary days. The goal isn’t perfection, but awareness. The beautiful thing about slow parenting is that it gives you permission to stop chasing impossible standards.

Instead of asking, “Am I doing enough?” You begin asking, “Was I present?”

That’s a far kinder question and often, a far more meaningful one.

At the end of the day, slow motherhood isn’t about doing less simply for the sake of it. It’s about creating enough space to experience the present moment rather than constantly racing toward the next.

You’ll still have laundry, deadlines, school lunches, busy weeks, but you’ll also notice more laughter, more conversations and more connection throughout everyday life.

Perhaps that’s the greatest gift we can give our children: Not a perfect childhood, but one filled with presence, patience and love.

Article supplied with thanks to Mum’s At The Table

About the Author: Adriana is Mums At The Table’s part-time digital content creator and writes from Kingscliff, Queensland.

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The benefits of getting back to basics and focusing on what truly matters.

Our lives have become so busy and full of clutter that people often feel overwhelmed despite trying many complicated solutions and self-help fads.​ Adrian Munro from Richmind WA sees a simpler path to well-being.

Marriage and Family First

Adrian views relationships as concentric circles, with his wife and kids at the very centre. These closest relationships deserve the bulk of available time and energy outside of work. He and his wife are both reading books to focus on a flourishing marriage, while he also reads about parenting boys to be more deliberate and proactive.​

Friendships Take Intention

Beyond immediate family, friendships and community connections matter for emotional health. Lives can become busy on autopilot, leading to social isolation despite surface-level activity or online contacts. Being deliberate about real, face-to-face connections helps build the flourishing relationships everyone needs.​

Choosing Who Shapes Your Life

The outer circles include extended family, community friends, and more distant work acquaintances. Sometimes busyness with outer circles crowds out time for those closest in. Many people also carry fractured relationships in inner circles, but Adrian empathises with that pain while noting pathways back are often possible.​

Keep Learning, Keep Growing

Adrian invests in being the best husband and father he can be, knowing strong marriage and family ties will feel most meaningful later in life. Becoming so busy that priorities get skewed happens easily when saying yes to every catch-up. Proactive steps like reading and planning keep those key relationships healthy.​

Factors like financial stress, technology and busyness add clutter that harms wellbeing.

Takeaway: Back to Basics

Adrian’s challenge is to find ways to declutter time, money, technology and relationships. Ask yourself:

• Who are the friends and family lifting me up?
• Where can I invest more time and attention?
• What is one small way I can be a better spouse, parent, relative or friend?

Simple, timeless principles like prioritising family, slowing down, and building community lead to lives that truly flourish.

Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.

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How to keep your teen talking without pushing them away

Susan Woodworth from Walk and Talk Psychology  discusses the emotions that teenagers face as they are navigating different relationships and the pressure of those things competing for their attention.

“In my practice,” she began, “I actually give this homework to nearly all the parents of teenagers that I see.”

While toddlers have big emotions about the colour of their plate, teenagers are dealing with many internal emotions. Susan uses the term Conversation Loop to describe how to navigate talking with your teenager to keep them talking.

The Conversation Loop

“If your teenager came up to you and said, look, mum and dad, I’m having a really, really hard time and it would be really helpful if we could sit together and talk about this, that’s what you want them to hear.”

Unfortunately, it is seldom the case with teens.

Teenager Talk

“Teenager talk is a little different,” said Susan. “All behaviour is communication. The teenagers will say, ‘You don’t understand me. You don’t get it. You’re not even listening to me. It’s not the same as it was for you as it is for me.’”

Susan said that is their version of saying, ‘I am already irritated.’

Three Common Mistakes

One of the common mistakes parents can make is reacting to a behaviour before hearing the message underneath.

“If they’re giving you a hard time, they’re always having a hard time.”

The second is trying to have a serious conversation when parents are busy.

“Just before you are making dinner or getting ready to leave the house… Don’t have those conversations then. You are going to let your kid down when you have to leave.”

Finally, having these conversations while looking through your own lens of life experience.

“Instead, you need to focus on your child.”

Susan said it is more important to be with your child and pay attention to their problems, rather than trying to fix it through your own lived experience.

“Saying things like, ‘just don’t hang out with them… they’re not nice people,’ is an example where you are not actually listening to them.”

How to Have Conversations

1. Pay Attention

1. “Number one, pay attention to when they’re asking you to listen to them. Those words they said before, means, I need you to listen to me.

2. Set Aside Time

“You’ve got to set aside an hour of uninterrupted time to talk with them. It might not take that long, but it may do. So set aside an hour. And when you do it, have a relaxed atmosphere. So something non-confrontational, something like having bubble tea together or having hot chocolate or going for a walk together.”

3. Just Sit and Listen

Susan says that if your teenager doesn’t want to talk to you, just enjoy your time with them.

“Just sit and be quiet. No, don’t try and talk. Don’t say anything. Don’t offer advice. Don’t just say, ‘What’s going on? It looks like you’re having a hard time.’ Don’t offer any advice. Just listen.”

Susan recognises that it may be hard for parents to resist talking because so many want to offer wisdom and draw from their own experiences. She emphasises that listening is key.

“Just focus just on listening because there’s no point giving advice until you really understand what’s going on for them. So you don’t talk at all. When it’s your turn, when they’re finished, you try to repeat back what they’ve said in your own words.”

It helps them to see that you understand and hear them.

“Then you say, ‘Okay, what am I still not getting?’ If they say, ‘Close enough,’ it means ‘No’.”

“Ask them if they need any help, but usually once they’ve got the space to process this and talk about it. They’ve usually got it.”

Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.

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The parent trap of wanting to be liked

Recently, one of my teenagers completely lost it at me over a new tech rule I’d put in place.

I’d spent ages trying to work out what healthy boundaries should actually look like and eventually landed on a rule that, in their opinion, was outrageously strict.

“You’re making me hate you!”

OUCH!

Now, logically, I knew that they didn’t actually hate me. It was big teenage emotions, most of which had very little to do with me. But still… ouch.

You see, I was theoretically ready to be the strict Mum. The one who got rebelled against. The bad cop. What I wasn’t prepared for was how much I would want to be liked. How much I wouldn’t want to say ‘no’.

What my teenager didn’t see was that I was kind of already doubting myself. I knew our rules looked different to some other houses, and I was painfully aware of how overprotective and ridiculous I probably looked in their eyes. Part of me wanted to back down and make it all go away.

In that moment, it felt like there were two options.

1. Back down, avoid the conflict, and be liked.

2. Put on my big girl pants and allow my teenager to be unhappy with me.

Sometimes I get it wrong as a parent. I’ve been too firm before and I’ve had to apologise. Parenting isn’t about digging your heels in for the sake of it. But this boundary? At the heart of it was care for them. I genuinely believed it was good for them, even if they couldn’t see that yet.

And sometimes loving your child means telling them “no” even when it costs you something.

That felt much simpler when the kids were little. Of course they weren’t allowed to lick elevator buttons- boundaries seemed to rest more on common sense. But parenting tweens and teens lives in much muddier waters. Half the time you’re making decisions while questioning yourself the entire way through.

But I keep coming back to this question

Am I willing to be disliked in order to love my child well?

I’ve heard parents say they “lost” their child for a few years during the teen stage, only to reconnect later and hear, “You were right,” or “Thanks.” Even hearing that encourages me, because it reminds me that teenagers don’t always understand love when it arrives in the form of boundaries.

Sometimes love doesn’t look like a Hallmark card, but it looks like disappointment and conflict and holding firm while your kid rolls their eyes at you.

And sometimes that’s what loving them well requires.

“No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening, it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.” Hebrews 12:11 (NLT)

Article supplied with thanks to Rhema 99.7.

About the Author: Chloe Ellenbacher is the co-host of The Fresh Start Morning Show on Rhema 99.7.

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The dangerous rise of AI beauty rankings

Cyber Security expert, Rebekah Nijsen, discusses “Omoggle”, the app where AI judges users by their appearance.

What is Omoggle?

“It is a web-based live video chat that pairs 2 random users from across the world via webcam. So that’s the first aspect of it. ‘Omoggle‘ comes from a slang term for ‘look maxing’, which is the online culture that determines that a physical dominance over a person on their physical appearance.”

AI Determines the Score

Through this platform, users battle each other over how others rate their physical appearance. They use AI for facial analysis and determine a score.

“It looks at things like eye lift, jawline, skin tones, aspects like that. This only takes a few seconds and then a score is introduced. Now the winner is known as the ‘Mogger’ and the loser is known as ‘Mogged’ and that comes from the term mogging which comes through the lookmaxing culture.”

Viral Battles of Looksmaxxing

These battles are now going viral via live streaming platforms, like “Twitch” and “Kick”, so wider audiences now watch these battles.

“The people who jump on and have a look at these battles have the ability to encourage users or mock losers, which creates a pack mentality.”

This has the power to cause psychological triggers in young people, based on what AI is rating them. People as young as 12 are falling prey to shallow comparison and mockery.

“It’s web-based, which means you have internet connection and you have a webcam, then anyone can access it. It is an 18+ site, but all you have to do is click ‘yes, I’m over 18’ and you’re straight in. There’s no further age verification checks.”

“‘Twitch’ and ‘Kick’ are age restricted platforms under cyber-security legislation. However, ‘Omoggle’ is not.”

Parents – Start a Conversation

Rebekah said that parents need to have open conversations and chats with their children about physical appearances.

“Ask, ‘What do you think about physical appearance allowing you to have status in the online world. What do you like about yourself?”

Helping children to understand character being more valuable than status can help them with their self-esteem.

“We can do that in our conversations, but also by modelling that behaviour ourselves,” said Rebekah.

“Are they seeing that our most important thing is, putting our face on for the day and putting, makeup? Those things aren’t bad things. Absolutely not. I wear makeup.”

She argued to that end, if parents are so obsessed with health, eating and appearance, it can get noticed and imitated. Conversations and behaviour modelled at home enables them to have a healthier lens on how they view the world.

Know What Your Kids Are Viewing

Rebekah said the most important advice for parents to take heed of is to know what our kids are watching.

“We do that by physically seeing what they’re doing and making sure the devices are outside the bedrooms so we can actually see how they’re interacting online, but also by having those continual conversations with them and saying, ‘What did you see online today? Or, hey, I’ve seen this new craze come through. What are your opinions about it?’”

She argued that many kids would be outraged about it, because our kids are very switched on.

“We’re starting to see a switch with our kids starting to be a bit more empathetic and realizing, hey, we can be part of the solution here by calling out this behaviour.”

Encourage Their Opinion

Rebekah said this needs to be encouraged and fostered in the home so that kids feel like they have a voice.

“If we can actually say, ‘What you say is important and we’re going to give you a platform in the house to have an opinion,’ whether we agree with it or not. Hopefully that then teaches them that their voice matters. And then they can then start being the positive influence.”

Rebekah said there will always be a new app invented, hopefully with more conditions, but if parents look at the fundamentals of culture and what we are allowing our kids to view, we can then teach them to be critical in what they see as well.

Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.

Feature image: Canva

For someone in navigating infertility, grief and longing, being in church can feel almost unbearable at times.

“I might have suspected that I lost a pregnancy that week and somebody walks past with a newborn,” Susannah said.

“And you just think, I could probably get through this service without crying – if someone would give me a general anaesthetic.”

For five years, Susannah and her husband were unable to become pregnant.

“Five years of infertility is a very painful experience.”

An Auslan interpreter living in New South Wales’ Blue Mountains, Susannah still believes God was there with them.

Even if it didn’t feel like it.

“I think he was there but at the time, it felt pretty dark and dreary,” Susannah said.

“I’m just saying [to anyone else] it’s kind of OK to find it hard and to lament that before God.

“He values our honesty and doesn’t want us to lie to him about our experiences.”

God’s pattern

Susannah read articles and books which provided Christian reflection upon infertility, usually written after the author became pregnant.

This frustrated Susannah who was looking for “dispatches from the trenches [to] help me get out of bed today”.

Wanting to think clearly, and biblically, about infertility while she was going through it, Susannah began to write The Fruitful Soul: Infertility and the Christian Life to be published mid 2026.

Without knowing what the end of the story of pregnancy might be for her family, Susannah explored the question “What does God think about all of this suffering, self-blame, the fallenness of the world?”

One key pattern she discovered in Scripture actually offered grounding hope to someone experiencing infertility.

“Jesus suffered first, and then he was resurrected – and that is the shape of our lives as well,” Susannah said.

“Suffering first and then glory, that is the shape of the Christian life.”

As a clear reference point, Susannah pointed to the New Testament book of 2 Timothy: “If we’ve died with him, we will also live with him… If we suffer with him, we will also reign with him.” (2 Timothy 2:11 NIV)

For Susannah, the encouragement is not instant answers, but a trustworthy pattern: “That’s what we’re looking for in our lives.”

A call for churches: sensitive, present, and real

As much as Susannah found church gatherings to be unintentionally painful, she is grateful for the support she received.

“I don’t remember any time when anyone has ever made my suffering worse and they have made it an awful lot better just by being there,” Susannah said.

Still, she encouraged churches to think carefully about how they discuss or celebrate motherhood.

“Try and avoid any rituals that divide women up into mothers and not mothers, because motherhood’s not always visible,” Susannah said, reflecting on unseen grief such as miscarriage.

Her message to anyone walking through infertility is compassionate and practical.

“You’re not alone. One in six couples will go through some kind of infertility,” Susannah said.

“Don’t rest until you’ve found somebody to walk that journey with you. You need care; don’t do it alone.”

Article supplied with thanks to Hope Media.

About the Author: Ben hosts Mornings on Hope 103.2 and the ‘Money: Faith & Finance’ podcast.

Feature image: Canva

Manage some of the mental load with tools that save time instead of wasting it.

Do you feel like your brain never really switches off? Even when you’re resting, there’s a background list running: Appointments, school notes, meals, birthdays, work deadlines, emotional check-ins and all the tiny things no-one else sees.

Most mums don’t need more productivity hacks; they need less thinking, fewer decisions and a bit more breathing room. You don’t need more apps, more systems or more things to “learn”. What you need is help, the kind that actually takes something off your plate.

That’s where AI tools can quietly step in. There are a lot of AI models that can make things feel a tiny bit easier. Not in a futuristic, robot way, but in a “thank goodness I don’t have to think about this tonight” way. Used well, it becomes less about technology and more like an assistant sitting beside you while you juggle kids, work, school messages and the constant background noise of life.

When used simply, AI becomes a quiet support, like a calm AI assistant that helps you organise thoughts, draft things faster and take some of the mental load off your shoulders.

A second brain for the mental load

One of the most draining parts of motherhood is carrying everything in your head. Planning is invisible work and it adds up fast. AI assistants work like a second brain you can check in with at any time.

Instead of opening multiple tabs, doing a frantic Google search or scrolling through search engines, you can ask an AI chatbot one clear question and get a usable answer in real time. You can ask it to help you make a weekly plan, organise routines or break overwhelming tasks into small action items.

This isn’t about perfection. It’s about getting unstuck faster and moving on with your day.

“What’s for dinner?” without the spiral

Meal planning is one of those daily decisions that quietly drains energy. AI tools are especially good at this kind of practical, everyday content creation.

Mums often use generative AI tools to:

• Create a simple weekly meal plan
• Suggest dinners using ingredients already in the fridge
• Adjust meals for kids, allergies or budget
• Generate a grocery list you can copy straight into notes

While AI doesn’t replace a nutritionist or pediatrician, it can be helpful for planning ideas for meals, especially when you don’t want to feed the kids another Vegemite sandwich.

Help with school admin and all the boring stuff

AI is also incredibly useful for the small admin tasks that pile up. Need to reply to a teacher, write a permission note or draft an email that sounds calm when you’re anything but? An AI assistant can help you put words together quickly.

This is especially helpful inside tools you already use, like Google Docs or your email. Instead of staring at a blank page, you can ask AI to draft something, then tweak it so it sounds like you.

AI tools can also help with creative tasks when your energy is stretched thin. Need ideas for birthday parties, school projects or family activities? Want help creating simple images or AI-generated images for invitations or presentations? Many tools now include image generation alongside writing support.

Here are some AI prompts you may want to use:

• Write a short, polite email to my child’s teacher explaining that my Year 3 son, [Name], will be absent on [insert date] due to illness. Keep it warm, clear and under 120 words.
• Summarise this school newsletter in five bullet points focusing only on dates, money due and action items for parents.
• Explain this homework instruction in simple language for a tired parent and a nine-year-old: [paste the instruction].

At the end of the day, when you’re tired and needing a little break, AI can help smooth the workflow.

Support for working mums and side hustles

For mums juggling paid work, freelancing or managing a small business, AI can save hours each month. It can help outline ideas, polish writing and organise thoughts without needing long stretches of focus.

Some mums use AI to plan social media content, write social posts, summaries, product descriptions or landing pages, or brainstorm ideas for projects. Others use it to summarise documents, prepare talking points or structure work so it fits around family life. You stay in control; the tool just gets you started.

Most of this is available on a free version or free trial. Paid plans usually unlock advanced features, priority support or early access to new features, but they’re optional. The basic features are often more than enough.

Here are some AI prompts you may want to use:

• For planning social media content: “Create a simple weekly content plan for my small business Instagram account. I sell [product/service] and I post three times a week. Include post ideas and short caption starters.”
• For product descriptions: “Write a clear, friendly product description for [product], aimed at busy mums. Keep it under 150 words and focus on benefits, not just features.”
• For social media posts: “Write three Instagram captions to promote my [product/service] that sound warm, relatable and not salesy. Include a simple call-to-action at the end.”

Emotional support (without judgement)

This part surprises a lot of mums. Sometimes you just want to think things through, process and ruminate about things without saying them out loud. AI can offer a space to think through emotions, rehearse conversations or process decisions without pressure.

It’s important to remember AI works like social media: It learns what you like, favour or engage with repeatedly, then shows you more of the same. AI is designed to please you, so should not replace a professional, especially when it comes to mental health support. However, it can help in the moment, especially late at night when everyone else is asleep and your brain won’t switch off.

AI is a type of echo chamber, which isn’t something you want for real-world critical thinking skills. It is best used as a tool, but not as a replacement for real people, real connection and real mental processing.

Free versus paid: What you actually need

There are so many free AI tools, most mums start with a free plan and many stay there. Free plans usually come with a limited number of uses per month, but for everyday tasks, that’s often plenty. If you do lots of writing or need extended research capabilities, you can use the premium versions of apps like Grammarly or Perplexity.

Paid plans may include premium features, custom pricing or extra capacity for businesses and students, but they’re not required to get real value. The goal isn’t to use AI constantly, it’s to use it when it helps. You still want your original creativity and flow, which doesn’t rely on AI, using it rather as a help than a micro-managing boss.

Using AI in a way that feels right

AI should support your life, not take it over. You don’t need early access, every update or every new feature. You don’t need to understand how artificial intelligence works behind the scenes.

The best approach is simple:

• Use AI to reduce mental load
• Keep decision-making in your hands
• Ignore features you don’t need
• Stop using a tool if it adds stress

AI works best when it’s quiet, optional and flexible.

Many modern AI tools are designed to feel intuitive, allowing mums to interact using natural language rather than learning complicated systems. You can start with simple text prompts, ask follow-up questions to refine answers and quickly pull out the key points you actually need.

The AI tools mums are using

Here is a list of the more common tools mums love:

• Gemini or Claude: Conversational AI that answers questions, drafts text, brainstorms ideas and helps you plan or organise things using simple prompts.
• Canva: Design tool with built-in AI features that can generate images, suggest layouts, write short text and quickly resize or repurpose designs for different platforms.
• Grammarly: Writing assistant with AI that checks spelling and grammar, suggests clearer wording, adjusts tone (more formal or casual), and can generate or expand short pieces of text.
• Perplexity: AI search assistant that looks up information online, then gives short, sourced summaries so you can get key points without deep-diving into every article.

These tools offer free and paid options and can be helpful time-savers for admin, research, drafting emails, study and creating images for social media.

The bottom line

You probably aren’t going to use all the AI features like voice cloning, image generation or deep integration across your entire Google workspace and that’s perfectly fine. Maybe what you really want is a simple cheat sheet for cleaning the house, a weekly list of appointments or a few ideas for fun things to do during the school holidays.

There’s a wide range of options, but you can pick and choose what actually helps you and your family, giving you a little more breathing room. Most of us will never need the pro plan and some of us aren’t fans of AI mode on Google (me included), but you’ll find yourself happily using text prompts and follow-up questions to get exactly what you need.

With the right approach, even just a few of these tools can make your day feel a lot smoother, letting you focus on what really matters.

AI doesn’t make you a better mum. It doesn’t replace intuition, care or connection. It doesn’t replace a doctor or a teacher. What it can do is help you think more clearly, plan faster and carry less in your head. Used gently, the best AI tools feel less like technology and more like support; there when you need it, invisible when you don’t.

In the middle of everything you’re already doing, it can help to have everything in one place, giving your mind a break when you hit the pillow at night.

Article supplied with thanks to Mum’s At The Table

About the Author: Adriana is Mums At The Table’s part-time digital content creator and writes from Kingscliff, Queensland.

Feature image: Canva