As we head into a new year, many parents are reflecting on family routines and goals for 2026. One common challenge is helping children take responsibility for everyday tasks – like putting away school bags, picking up towels, or tidying toys – without constant reminders. While it may seem like children are acting deliberately, understanding what’s happening in their brains can completely change how we respond.

Learning Intervention Specialist, Natalie Nicholls from PLECS Learning, shared insights about resilient kids and how parents can take a compassionate, brain-based approach to executive functioning as they head into the new year.

Understanding the “See and Do” Approach

Natalie explained that expecting children to automatically complete tasks often overlooks how their brains process information. For example, a child may ignore a school bag left in the hallway, not out of defiance, but because their brain is overwhelmed with other priorities or sensory input.

“When we delve into the why underneath, it helps us get more action and the results we’re actually looking for,” Natalie said.

As we start a new year, parents can shift their perception. Instead of assuming a child is being difficult, ask: What else is going on in their brain right now? Recognising that each child – and adult – is wired differently is a crucial first step toward effective, compassionate guidance.

How Brain Chemistry Influences Behaviour

Natalie highlighted the role of dopamine, a chemical that influences motivation, task initiation, and attention. Low dopamine levels, often seen in children with ADHD traits, can make it harder for kids to start tasks or notice what needs to be done.

Parents can support their children in the new year by:

1. Exploring ways to increase dopamine naturally
2. Using structured strategies to teach children how to see and act on tasks

“We cannot expect a child’s behaviour to exceed the brain’s capacity,” Natalie explained. “This applies to adults too – when expectations exceed capacity, we get stressed, anxious, and overwhelmed.”

Understanding this principle allows parents to approach children with more compassion and less frustration in 2026 and beyond.

Trauma and Neurodiversity: Seeing the Bigger Picture

Natalie also addressed the impact of trauma and neurodiversity. Children who have experienced trauma may react based on the age at which the trauma occurred. Similarly, children with ADHD or other neurodiverse traits may appear hyperactive or withdrawn.

“The brain will go into protective mode,” Natalie said. “When parents are stressed too, their child’s nervous system mirrors that stress.”

Recognising these patterns ensures that teaching moments occur when both parent and child have the capacity to engage, rather than in moments of heightened emotion – a crucial approach to begin the year with calm and clarity.

Practical Steps for “See and Do”

Natalie outlined practical ways to implement this approach as families start fresh in the new year:

1. Check Your Capacity First – Ensure you’re calm before addressing tasks. Teaching when triggered is ineffective.
2. Start Small – Use micro-moments in everyday life. Speak out loud about what you see, e.g., “I see the dishwasher is full. What could we do?”
3. Ask Questions, Don’t Command – Invite participation rather than issuing orders. For example: “Can you help me with the groceries?” instead of “Put the groceries away.”
4. Praise the Action, Not the Person – Focus feedback on specific behaviour rather than personal traits: “You noticed the gate needed opening and did it – great work!”
5. Build Life Skills – These micro-moments teach children to notice and act on tasks independently, a skill that extends to school, work, and life beyond the home.

“This isn’t just about a tidy house,” Natalie emphasised. “It’s about equipping children with a skill for life.”

A Kinder Approach for a Fresh Start

By focusing on compassion, brain capacity, and micro-teaching moments, parents can reduce frustration and help children develop independence as we head into 2026. Natalie’s approach encourages parents to shift perception, ask questions, and provide structured support, rather than relying on repeated commands or criticism.

“The goal is not a perfect house, but resilient kids who can see, decide, and act,” Natalie concluded.

Key Takeaways for Parents This New Year

• Recognise your child’s brain capacity before setting expectations
• Use questions and observation instead of commands
• Praise specific actions, not personal traits
• Focus on micro-moments to teach life-long skills

Implementing these strategies can help families start the new year with calmer routines, stronger bonds, and resilient, capable children ready to face the year ahead.

Article supplied with thanks to Sonshine.

Feature image: Canva

New year, new you, right? That’s the way it’s supposed to be in January. But what if you aimed for a new year, sustainable you?

The last few years, since burning myself out and wrecking my back, I have approached New Year’s differently. Instead of focusing on grand resolutions that inevitably fail, my focus has been on small, sustainable habits that bring about long-term change. Instead of treating the new year as a deadline to overhaul my entire life and start again, I view it as more of a checkpoint.

This has resulted in a slower start to the new year. It means I don’t start feeling as if I am behind. I don’t start January with the feeling that I have already failed. It means I don’t feel like the new year has intense pressure before it even begins.

If you want to try this for yourself, start with a straightforward list of what worked for you in the past year and what didn’t. Things on my list that didn’t work in 2025 were:

• Drinking caffeine after 12
• Doom scrolling in the hour before bed
• Consuming a high percentage of content based around the darker side of life (Think shows like Criminal Intent and SVU)

I am adding a disclaimer in here: your personal convictions about what you consume are your own. I am not saying these shows are bad; I am not saying watching them is bad. My only point is that I notice a distinctly negative shift in my thinking and attitude when I consume a lot of this sort of media, which is unfortunate because it’s my favourite genre.

Things that worked well for me in 2025 were things like:

• Charging my phone in the kitchen at night
• Starting my morning with a few minutes outside
• Being in God’s word before scrolling

Use these lists to pick a couple of habits to work on for the new year. I picked one I wanted to add in, no caffeine after 12. It’s something I have been inconsistent with, but I notice a big difference in my sleep when I am strict with it. I’ve identified three habits that I definitely want to stay in 2026. They are habits I have already built into my life, with some level of consistency. These habits are sustainable, low-key, and make a long-term difference to my mental health and well-being.

I use my daily planner to track my habits, which helps keep me accountable. I also discuss my progress with my coach. Once these habits become consistent, I will consider implementing other things I would like to do.

January is a great time to take stock of what is working and what isn’t in your life. It gives you a chance to pause and reevaluate, but it doesn’t have to be a complete life do-over. Instead of new year, new you, try aiming for new year, sustainable you.

Article supplied with thanks to Lorrene McClymont.

About the Author: Lorrene McClymont is a writer and photographer from Hope Images. On her blog ‘Moments to Rest’, she shares about rest, faith, and family.

Feature image: Canva